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Tina Cacilhas usually spends Mother’s Day at her grandmother’s house in Fremont, celebrating, eating, and hanging out with her son and family.
But this year, she asked that the whole event be canceled, after finding out Saturday her son, 17-year-old Armando Canales, was killed when a drunk driver plowed head on into a car Canales was riding in early Saturday.
“I’m crushed,” Cacilhas said Sunday in an interview. “My heart is completely empty. My son was my everything.”
Friends of Canales said he was a passenger in a Toyota with four other teenagers who were headed to the beach early Saturday on Highway 17.
Just after 2 a.m., authorities said the driver who allegedly caused the crash, 28-year-old Ashley Marie Oliver of San Jose, was driving north in the southbound lanes of 17 near Redwood Estates, and crashed into the Toyota Canales was in. Canales, along with two other teens in the car, were not wearing seatbelts, according to the CHP.
Three other people from the Toyota were hospitalized with injuries not believed to be life-threatening. One was treated at the scene for minor injuries.
Cacilhas and friends of Canales said they are having a hard time grappling with his death.
“I’m still in denial mode, and can’t accept the fact that my son is gone, when I had just saw him the night of,” Cacilhas said.
“It’s like a nightmare,” she said. “You want to wake up, it’s so unreal.”
“It’s just hurting me,” Jorden Brown, 17, one of Canales’ friends, football teammates and classmates at Washington High School in Fremont, said.
“I walked in his room and I just started crying, because every time I would walk in his room, he’s sitting right there on his gaming chair playing video games, and this time he wasn’t there, and he’s not coming back,” Brown said.
“I love that dude forever, no matter what.”
Cacilhas said her son, a junior at Washington, was a “social butterfly” who got along easily with others, was protective of his friends and those who needed help, and wanted to become a fireman.
He played football, basketball, and he loved video games, she said.
“My son, he loved life, he had goals in life,” she said. “He was so looking forward to graduating next year.”
The Mission Valley Regional Occupational Program praised Canales, who was a student in its fire technology program.
“We are deeply saddened to learn of Armando Canales’ passing. Our thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends,” Mission Valley Superintendent Thomas Hanson said in a statement Monday.
“It is difficult for us to grasp this loss as we focus on assisting students and staff who are trying deal with this terrible news.”
Staff members plan to honor Canales at the program’s upcoming Memorial Day ceremony Thursday. In addition, Canales’ fire technology class placed his firefighting gear at his assigned classroom seat. It will stay there for the rest of the school year.
As of Monday night, a campaign set up Sunday morning to support Cacilhas in paying for funeral costs on GoFundMe.com had well surpassed a $10,000 goal, climbing to $14,228, thanks to donations from more than 300 people.
Julio Valdez, 16, said he knew “Mando” since first grade, when Canales moved into the same apartment complex as him, and they’ve been friends ever since, even taking the same fire tech classes at school.
“We talked about our dreams together, we talked about girls, we talked about everything together,” Valdez said. “We talked about how we both were going to make it together. And how we would grow up together,” he said Sunday.
“He was my best friend. I called him my brother.”
Valdez said Canales was an encouraging force in his life.
“He’d always pick me up. If I messed up in a class, I messed up on a test, or if I messed up in fire tech, he’d be right there, and he’d be like, ‘Hey, let’s go get another one. You’ll get it next time. You got it.’”
“He was just one of those guys, that no matter what, he could be having the worst day of his life…and he’ll still be picking you up with a smile, just so you’ll smile,” Valdez said.
Oliver, the drunken driver, was arrested on tentative charges of felony drunken driving and vehicular manslaughter after she was released from the hospital, California Highway Patrol Officer Ross Lee said.
She is being held in Santa Clara County Jail on $275,000 bail, and no charges have been filed against her as of Monday afternoon, according to county records and the district attorney’s office.
A CHP officer had spotted Oliver’s Chrysler minivan driving the wrong direction just before the crash but couldn’t catch up to the car and stop it in time. Instead, the officer arrived after the minivan collided head-on with the Toyota, Lee said.
“I think it’s very unfortunate, because he was a great person and he didn’t deserve to be taken away from this earth this early, and by someone who was under the influence,” Valdez said.
Cacilhas, a single mother, said she’s been surrounded by family and friends since the news of Canales’ death. Valdez, Brown, and other friends of Canales were at her home Sunday night supporting her.
She said she’s been trying to “make something good out of a tragedy” by sitting all of Canales’ friends down to tell them to make smart choices around alcohol, and to never drink and drive. “There has to be some good to come out of it,” she said.
Bob Moran, principal of Washington High School, said Monday students were making use of the various counseling services the school had set up to talk about their feelings after learning of Canales’ death.
He also said counselors have been speaking directly in the classes Canales had this year, Moran said.
“A lot of times when this happens, you’re not getting a lot of teaching done in those classes on this day. And a lot of times kids don’t want to leave their friends in those classes to go to the crisis center. Sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t. So I think it’s a good way to make sure you’re reaching everyone,” he said.
“He was a good kid, he had a lot of friends. And, as expected, a lot of students are saddened by this news, and are taking it very hard,” Moran said.
“It’s very sad. Very sad.”
“Just knowing he’s not going to be here, kills me,” Valdez said about his friend.
“Someone I would hang out with every day of my life. Someone I would text daily, someone I would call daily,” he said.
“Now I can’t call him, I can’t text him.”
At an emotional vigil attended by hundreds Monday night at the flagpole at Washington High, many family members, friends, teammates and classmates spoke fondly of Canales. Some shared their grief, others recalled light-hearted moments of eating or playing sports with him, and some spoke about how they first met him.
Canales’ football jersey from the school was draped over a lectern, and was later presented to his mother by his teammates.
Cacilhas told the group at the vigil she’ll miss his “cheesy smile,” and implored them to learn from the tragic situation.
“Remember, this could easily have been one of you. Take the message. Do not drink and drive,” she said.
“I will never ever get to celebrate a Mother’s Day again with my son,” she said, while holding back tears. “Instead, I have to plan a funeral for my son.”
A remembrance will be held 6 p.m. Tuesday at Shakers Pizza, 4075 Thornton Ave., friends said.
Social media also saw people affected by the tragic collision share their grief.
rest in paradise my beautiful angel 👼🏼❤️🕊 I hope your smiling down from heaven alongside Nevaeh & I pray you look over me #mandosworld4L 🌎❤️🕊 5/11/19
— lulbratnatt🖤 (@Nataleezelayaa) May 11, 2019
https://twitter.com/auusttinnn_/status/1127285472915386368
i hope you restin in paradise w nevaeh , long live forever in our hearts , the both of you 💯❤️ #nevaehsworld #mandosworld
— gasoangelina 🏆💯 (@gbESTRELL1T4) May 11, 2019
anything will help. https://t.co/9B3qk6nKWP
— Jas 🤍 (@BandzOutJas) May 12, 2019
Please support! Anything helps❤️ #MANDOS🌍 https://t.co/YWdsDcRIlv
— S🌙🖤 (@sarahlunaaa__) May 12, 2019
A friend of my 17 year old sons was killed Friday night by a drunk driver. He was a funny, kind, and genuinely authentic soul. This mother’s day his single mother is planning her 16 year old sons funeral. Devastating. Please RT and donate if you canhttps://t.co/bn44zKnTuF
— Heather 🌊🌊💙💙💙 (@Heathers1031) May 12, 2019
https://t.co/txmjRXLhhh
Lost a little brother this weekend from a drunk driver. Please don’t drink & drive. Taking such a young life is heartbreaking.— Jalena Valdez✨ (@JalenaValdez) May 12, 2019
https://twitter.com/viviiiannaaaa/status/1127672635821662209
Staff writers Nico Savidge and Robert Salonga contributed to this report. Contact George Kelly at 408-859-5180.
